Tuesday 4 June – Till Next Time

by Amelia Evans

A flower is on stage. Characters A, B, C, D, E and F are there.

A is doing a high intensity workout from the computer screen

C is playing a killing video game

B is reading the paper

D is watching the news from June 4th 2019, while tweeting on their phone.

E is talking on their phone

E     It’s ok.

Yes I know.

    But whatever it is – it’s ok…

    Even if it’s that…

I know

    But if it’s that – then it’s that and that’s ok

    Ok?

Ok

C dies in the game

A get’s tired and just watches the video of others working out

B starts making paper planes from the paper

D falls asleep

E hangs up the phone – turns off D’s TV, puts a blanket over them

A Turns off the workout video

C Turns off the video game and sits with B making paper planes

A looks at the flower.

They all take a breath.

Tuesday 28 May – A Drowning Man

by Amelia Evans

To sin: a verb meaning: “an immoral act considered to be a transgression against divine law”. Derived from the Biblical Greek hamartia and Hebrew hatar : “to miss the mark” – or the point maybe?

OUR LEADER: Oh god! What a day – another miracle. I was sworn in and I said, like we discussed – that I would govern with humility, compassion and for all Australians.  I mean – I know you were there, you saw it but, you were proud of me weren’t you?

    He waits for an answer…

We’ll talk about it later. I’m so grateful for everything you’ve done! Miracle after miracle after miracle. AH! I did have one question though. Tiny… but… ahh…what should I do now?

    He waits…

You there? I mean I know you’re the one with the plan I’m here to do your work but if you could give me a sign of what that is exactly

A knock on the door and in walks a staff member

STAFF MEMBER: Um Mr Leader hello hello so sorry to interrupt but we’ve had another I’m afraid, just attempted, on manus. Set themselves alight but survived thank god

OUR LEADER: Oh for crying out loud. How many’s that? No – no don’t tell me. Listen, I’m in a very important chat right now and I’m

STAFF MEMBER: So sorry, of course, of course it can wait no hurry

    They exit, Our Leader resumes prayers

OUR LEADER: Sorry about that! So as I was saying I’m not sure what do so if you could give me a sign

LITTLE MIRACLE: Daddy? Daddy

OUR LEADER: Well if it isn’t my little miracle. What’s up?

LITTLE MIRACLE:. I was watching TV and there were thousands of kids not going to school all across the world in protest. They said there its because there is an ecological crisis

OUR LEADER: Well that’s silly – can’t be prime minister if you don’t go to school now can you?

He taps her on the nose, she looks a bit worried.

OUR LEADER: Darling, you’re not worried are you? What do I always say?

LITTLE MIRACLE: Gods got a plan

OUR LEADER: That’s right – God’s got a plan and right now I’m talking to Him about it so don’t you worry about a thing. Daddy’s got this.

LITTLE MIRACLE: Thanks Daddy

OUR LEADER: So where was I? Oh yes… a sign

Anxiety bursts in   

ANXIETY:  BLLLAAGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

OUR LEADER: Um – who are you?

ANXIETY: Your anxiety!

OUR LEADER: What? No. I don’t have anxiety

ANXIETY: You do now!!! Da ta da da ta da RAHARAHARAHAH

Anxiety starts a song and dance number, perhaps with an entourage of bright and manic in tow.

OUR LEADER: No – No – get out! God?! Have you forsaken me? And Jesus Christ – you’re not much better. I asked for a sign and this malarkey is all I get! What the hell, mate? What the hell

    Anxiety and its song and dance drowns him out.

Tuesday 21 May – Bloom

by Amelia Evans

A human is in the world. There is a flower there.

HUMAN    Fuck Queensland

Cancel it – cancel Queensland

Fuck Clive and Pauline and Scott and Rupert

Fuck  the system, fuck humanity – we’re fucked

I’m moving to New Zealand

Sorry – world –that’s it

Was a nice dream that we could save you but it’s done

We’re doomed

WORLD    How dare you

HUMAN    How dare I what?

WORLD    Litter your toxic rubbish on me

HUMAN    I don’t litter

WORLD    You just cursed humanity itself

HUMAN    That’s just words.

WORLD    Don’t you know that words are spells? That everything you do and say is a spell – how do you think the system was created in the first place

HUMAN    But I’m angry!

WORLD    So be angry

HUMAN    But they –

WORLD    They they they. You think I don’t know their hearts? Your heart. I fucking am your heart.

HUMAN    Then you know I feel like its gonna break

WORLD    So let it. Let it break for the oil spills and the nuclear meltdowns and the micro plastic and the extinctions and the warming and the rising sea levels

HUMAN    Fuck

WORLD    How does that feel?

HUMAN    It hurts

WORLD    Good

HUMAN    I’m scared

WORLD    You should be – it’s fucking terrifying.

HUMAN    I don’t know what to do

WORLD    Look at the flower

Remember that the same 13.8 billion years of universal evolution  that led life to create itself out of chemicals – led to this moment. A flower blooming and you there to see it

    You think the coal industry – or some system called capitalism is a match for the survival instinct of life itself?

HUMAN    I don’t know…

WORLD    Then sit down and keep looking at that flower till you do.  

Tuesday 14 May (1) – Swing Voter Blues

by Amelia Evans

Human Fuck – I’m having a heart attack.
Of course! Of course I am.
Come to the beach – to get away – to get away from it all
And have a fucking heart attack
No service – that’d be right – can’t call anyone
Alright well… I’ll just die here then


Still alive.
That’d be right – not even a heart attack
Can’t even commit to that!

It’s soooo haaaaard
I don’t know what to do

This is the fate of a swing voter – oh god
Five days from an election
Everyone’s trying to court me –
Everyone wants me
And I don’t know

Oh it’s such a beautiful day!
But is it supposed to be this beautiful in May?
Is this a horror show? Is this a fucking horror show this beautiful day?
Maybe I’ll vote greens – maybe I’ll just fucking vote greens
NO! I don’t want climate change –
THIS IS JUST A BEAUTIFUL DAY NOTHING MORE SHUT UP

If only my dad had been a labour man from way back
A union man from way back
A slap you on the back – skull a beer –good on ya mate man from way back

Or or that I lived in a mansion and both my kids were at private schools and I wore a blue shirt everyday and even IF climate change is real Toorak is still quite a way from the water…

I’ve got to admit – Scott Morrison seems like a nice guy
A nice guy to get a beer with at the pub
Bill Shorten – he seems like a nice guy too
He also seems like he’d be a nice guy to have a beer with at the pub

And Clive Palmer – he seems like if I had a beer at the pub with him – that’d be ok
And he does say he wants to get things done
He will build a very fast train 300 kilometers out of the city
Not to another city but to another pace
Maybe I WANT to go 300 kilometers out from the city to another place
And he reckons I could afford to buy a house out there and have a family
That does sound nice!
Yes. Yes.
Another place 300 kilometers away from the city on a very fast train